My Dirty 🙊 imagination list./ My Problem list. 

.I am not ashamed of my feelings….but I am always confused. 

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I am  a deep thinker….my thoughts have no limits…sometimes it’s goes into such a pit that it’s difficult for me to come out. 

There  are reasons behind these kinds of thoughts…it’s actually because I can’t stop thinking about others.  My thoughts get influenced by the judgemental feeling of those around me.

I don’t want to judge others but when l see the consequences…. I start making predictions which almost/ nearly gets true. It’s one of my power. 

For example: –

  •  1)I made predictions about separation of two  persons (hint)🤔 . They are not happy together.  My judgement was made on basis of their behaviour…and I am feeling guilty as if ;it was I who separated them. 
  • 2) It is about my own sister….you know once she told me. I have no right  to write about her personal life.  And I think it’s right . I should not write ..but the only thing is I care about her….and I can’t see her being dumped once again. 

My own personal life is also a mess.  I have done so many mistakes…”it’s true! I have no right to judge.” But they are just my views…I am not ashamed of my feelings….but I am always confused. That is the reasons I have question Mark ?  expression in my face every time. 

I know ; I have less number of readers…but it would be interesting if any of them could just  share there experiences with me regarding the following questions: –

  1. Have you ever  fall in one-sided love? 💘
  2. If you  never had desire  to be kissed? 💏
  3. Always fall for wrong person.
  4. Have  you been dumped more than twice? 🖓
  5. Feelings cheated by life.👎👎 
  6. Want to kill someone  very badly. 🗡🗡
  7. Your boss never gives you holiday. 📉📆🗒
  8. Your crush loves someone else. 😝🙏
  9. Don’t want to get married. 💝💝
  10. Want to get power to control your life. 
  11. Want to have money without hard work  

Hope some of you comment/inbox/ email  me at- anelife16@gmail.com  

Or Mycovertlife.wordpress 

To help me out. 

PS :- Wishing happy Diwali in advance. 💣💣

 

MEN’S AROUND ME

Recently I was very much busy……in fact I am still busy .but as I was craving of  with something; I thought …I should write it … its actually one of my PMS symptoms you know..

Ok ….. It’s about men’s   all around me…

As you know last month was my birthday…most people around me didn’t even remember because they all depend on Face -book birthday alert…which I still hate…. I don’t know!  “How do people use to remember birthdays before FB came in existences.?”

I was disappointed by my friends…Specially some closed once  ,because I expected something from them. Even my boyfriend had no idea that it was my birthday. So ,I have to  punish him….  I didn’t talk to him for two weeks and basically ignored him.

I know, he didn’t got any hint …what’s  into me…or what is going on…so I just said “its September month!” …and then it strike him -what the reasons!   He said “I am sorry, I complete forgot”. I said “Ok, and ask him some time for me  . “

So, in last week what I did was visited him in  his place ….I talked with him for hours and I was satisfied…..as it was the thing I always  wanted to do … the best part was-  I saw his room …. I shared blanket with him…I clicked his unwashed face and captured some funny moments.

I don’t know whether he understands my feelings for him or not … but I actually love him for that very moment…although for short time…but I could have kissed him… I was enjoying that feeling of shyness.

After few hours I have to leave  … but I asked him next time I want a proper date…

So ,this is  how  finally I satisfied my birthday wish.

Next day was normal…everything went well…

There were some new fresher in my work place…all of them are men…It is nothing new for me…because I am only woman in office , I have got used to it…the  only problem is that they have not got used  to me…. I hate constant staring …. Like; I am monkey in a zoo. Yes, for them it might be difficult to accept that I am only woman officer other than maid/peon who dozes off in her chair.

I know after a year they will get use to me…if they want to  stay here longer.

So, everything went normal for two weeks… until first week of October …all stress and little bit miss understandings…

About…one thing was…I was missing someone very constantly  …I use to visit his profile very often…see all his likes/ unlike s…even traced out his recent dating stories…..(yes I am talking about my crush/friend)   things between us are sorted out … I just wanted to know -‘how he is doing…maybe he had find some person…yap still tab in’ .

The only thing which…matters for me…is I am happy…satisfied…and tired at same time…

PS :- I don’t know how I should talk with men’s around me … or how I should change their views…I am doing ,what can do…and that’s all.

प्यार कुछ मेरी नजर से 

जिन्हें गलती करने पर  घर पर छपल  और लाते मिली होगी

  •  मैं  ये  लेख हिंदी  भाषा  में  इसलिए लिख रही हूँ ताकि  मेरी बात सबको समझ आए ।

आज कुछ हुआ जो मुझे प्यार की सही परिभाषा को याद दिलाया।/
तो मैंने सोचा कि क्यों नहीं इस बकवास को  सभी के साथ साझा करू।

मेरे विचार में प्यार में कोई बुराई नहीं ।पर किसी के प्यार  में पड़ना  एक बवकूफी हैं । काफी लोग ये गलती करते हैं । 

 मैंने भी यह गलती की ।।।😁😁

पर समझदार वो  है; जो अपनी  और दुसरो की गलती से  सबक  ले। ‘जवानी ‘ ,एक ऐसा समय है ;जब प्यार जैसी गलती मामूली सी बात है । पर जवानी ,ही ऐसा समय जब  एक गलती जिंदगी भर का सबक बन जाती हैं । 

मैंने  एक समय देखा; जब मैं,  एकतरफा प्यार में पड़कर बिखर चुकी थी । उस समय मैंने बहुत गलत फैसले  लिए । पर  इसे पहले मैं अपने भविष्य का सर्वनाश करती, मेरे बड़ों के आशीर्वाद के कारण मैं सम्भल  गई

अब बड़ों का आशीर्वाद का मतलब मैं क्या बताऊ?  वो काफी समझदार लोग समझ ही गए होंगे- जिन्हें गलती करने पर  घर पर छपल  और लाते मिली होगी ।😂😂😂

जी हाँ मुझे भी मेरी माँ ने ऐसे लतड़ा 

आज भी जब मैं प्यार जैसे शब्द के बारे में  सोचती हूँ, मुझे माँ का प्यार ही पहले याद आता है । फिर सच्चाई तो यह है की प्यार सही समय पर सही  इंसान के साथ बहुत किश्मत वालों को ही होता है ।

प्यार तो  आजकल मिनटों में किसी से भी हो जाता है ।पर यह प्यार ,इतनी मुश्किलों को अपने साथ लेकर आता है; कि कोई इसे करने से पहले दस बार सोच ले।

किसी व्यक्ति से हमें प्यार विभिन्न प्रकार से हो सकता हैं । :-

  1. एकतरफा  प्यार ।
  2.  छुपारूतम प्यार।
  3. डरपोक वाला प्यार  ।
  4. खुलेआम वाला प्यार ।
  5. टाइम पास वाला  प्यार ।
  6. सच्चा वाला  प्यार ।
  • एकतरफा  प्यार । आज भी कितने लोग  इस  मोह में फंसे हुए है । कुछ तो समझ  जाते हैं  और  कुछ तो समझते ही नहीं । दिल के बार बार टुकड़े होते हैं  पर फिर  भी ये लगे रहते हैं ।
  • छुपारूतम प्यार। इसमें  दोनों ही ओर  आकर्षण होता है ।सब समझ भी होती हैं ,लेकिन सब कुछ छुपा कर करना पड़ता हैं । जमाने की नजरों से बचना होता है ।  हालात के साथ ;ये कभी भी बदल सकता हैं ।
  • डरपोक वाला । ये वाला प्यार तो छुपारूतम प्यार के जैसे ही होता है ।बस फर्क इतना है कि ये कभी  आगे नहीं  बढ़ सकता है । डर के कारण ये प्यार खामोश हो जाता है ।
  • खुलेआम वाला। ये वाला प्यार तो छुपारूतम प्यार के बिलकुल  उलट है । जहाँ  छुपारूतम  प्यार में  सब छुपा करते है । इस मे सब खुलेआम होता है । हर social media sites  में अपने प्यार को दिखाया जाता है । रिश्तेदारों की मंजूरी की भी जरूरत नहीं होती ।
  • टाइम पास वाला। ये वाला प्यार  बड़ा ही निकम्मा प्यार होता है । जिस व्यक्ति के पास करने के लिए कुछ नहीं होता वही निकम्मा व्यक्ति  दुसरो के दिल के साथ  खेल खेलता है ।
  • सच्चा वाला।ये वाला प्यार तो बहुत किश्मत वालों को ही होता है । कुछ ही सफल व्यक्ति है; जो  इस प्यार के सभी पड़ाव को सफलता से पार कर पाए हैं । इसमें दोनों ही व्यक्तियों को  आपना सब कुछ खोना पड़ता । जिसने ये कर  लिया  ,उसे प्यार में PhD के साथ; स्वर्ग भी  नसीब होता है ।😂😂👏👏❤


P.S. ये सच की प्यार को समझना मुश्किल है । मैं तो बस  अपने  दिमाग के फितुर  को  खतम कर रही हूँ । अगर आप लोगों को कोई दिक्कत हो तो मैं कुछ क्यों करूँ । आप को कौन सा वाला प्यार हुआ; अपने सुझाव दे सकते हैं ।


MY B’Day diary 

Saale kisi ko bhi mera birthday Yaad nhi)  Facebook main alert ka wait kyu karte hai.

One whole day/ night  and some truth.

Ok I don’t know how many of you will going read this…but this post is  actually about my views towards life. I am writing this post at 10:40…pm at eve of my birthday…which means after just few hour l will be 26yr. 

When I write 26…I actually feel awkward as it mean l am 26yr old person but by heart I am just 15…I am still trying to sort out things… well about statement which I made about my heart being 15 is utter lie… I am actually 26yr  and I also think like 26yr…but sometimes I behave like 10 years 😆😆.

Ok let just come to main subject of my post… I was thinking that when we grow up we start knowing people and how one person could be different from other…

Last year, I was feeling little low about how my life is now totally changed and I am left alone. 

This year the ..thing is ; I want to hide…because I don’t want to meet anyone new …I have started hating actual world…..
I see truth of life…and I feel everything thing is vain. 

There are reasons behind such feelings. 

A man gets married because,  he wants cook /maid/wife/ for himself.  Means woman is still secondary element.

A woman gets married because she don’t want to be single for life time and want a  ATM  …who should support her and her family and still want to live her life like free woman. 

A boss is always right…a even though we know sometimes he is wrong . (By his thought) 

People know about your difficulty ;but can’t help you because ,they don’t want to and want to be safe

Money is every thing…it make wrong people,right. 

You can’t help others unless you help yourself. 


Above points are some bitter truth I recently observed…and there are more…. but you know I am lazy in explaining everything  . It just that I  know; I have to live life this way…I can turn things better only when I turn them good for me. 

And what about the other half of my life….like what about my love interest, my family etc…

The things are good means I am not thinking too deeply now a days….because one day everyone has to die

7 AM 

I slept…..it’s morning now. And it’s my birthday! Yes, I am waiting for my birthday wishes. My colleagues  have no idea about my birthday…wondering whether I should treat them or not. 

It depends whether they know about it or not..

In fact  my own father had not wished me…but he loves me and that’s why he is living with me.

Which reminds me something which my boss said-“ when you go home(room)? Do You cook  your own meal??” it was a question. Because he knows I don’t know how to cook properly. 

Then it suddenly strike in my head “why is it expected that woman should  always be  good @cooking or should know how to cook”.

I could have said something witty, but as usual   I smile and said “my father helps me to cook ”.

Why don’t these men (Men who don’t believe in equity ) understand that the  world is changing. Household responsibilities are not only for women but also for men.

12 PM 

Guess what? Not a good day so far.

I got wishes from my mom and one of sister friend whom I consider as sister. But no wishes from my friends…although they are liking my profile pic in Facebook. 😆😆iss ke alwa bhi kuch karate nhi. 

1:30 pm 

Dozing like anything…

I want to leave.. but😜 I can’t leave my work  .

10:PM 

I am finally at home with My family. I back to myself….

So, it’s ending of the day… almost end of birthday and still waiting for more(or less expected once ) wishes   … may be tomorrow some confused people will wish me…I realize even if I try too much; it’s  hard to create my place in their heart.  I don’t worth it.   So for those who still think about me and care for me. I am  there in hearts. 😏😶. I love them…they know.

P.S.1 I hate my so called crush, boyfriend, and friends (Saale kisi ko bhi mera birthday Yaad nhi)  Facebook main alert ka wait kyu karte hai.😛😛😛

P.S. 2 I am actually feeling bad and I wish I could say something mean to them.  

Life is never simple 

Life is not about only good things …. It is also about things…which you never expect….

My life is just going through some phase…which I have never expected … although today I am independent … but I feel very much disappointed.

It is because; my all imagination about a wonderful life is getting shatter one by one.

I am at that point of time where I just want to relax…. But my mind is constantly working…and now it is over loaded.

You know what, I know some day I will reread my own post and smile on what I am writing.

….So now readers …if you are going to  read my post …. I am warning you … it is all about life shits…👉👉..https://anelife16.blogspot.in/2017/08/life-is-never-simple.html

MY THOUGHTS & LIFE NOT SO GOOD.

I do have some relationship goals.

Do you ever want to rewind your life…. I do….means I want to rewind it many times.

But obviously it’s my realistic natural life which is not a drama ….so it won’t change.

These days I am so much busy that I don’t have time to curse my boss or anyone. I am just busy with my work…and my self…but there are so many situations happening around me that I wonder why???  Like; Bakara banane main hi meli.

Ok …so here it goes…. (But before reading further ….post …. I would request my new readers to please read my earlier post to understand … my situations)

My last post was about a kiss…yes! Yap ….I actually, wanted to kiss him….but I am holding my dirty mind to myself only…..

Please click👈

👉https://anelife16.blogspot.in/2017/07/my-thoughts-life-not-so-good.html 

To read full post….

Without a kiss 

When you are in a relationship ,a kiss is something by which you show your affection for that special person to whom you love . Obviously first you should be sure of that relationship.

When you are in a relationship ,a kiss is something by which you show your affection for that special person to whom you love . Obviously first you should be sure of that relationship.
I am in relationship with  a promise. Which  I  made.
Its my fault…I  could not blame anybody. I am seeing a person from last 5 years and I don’t know why there is no progress. Sometimes as woman I want more from this relationship but as I am still not sure about it. I can’t go any further…. 

   Please click on the link to read in detail. 

https://anelife16.blogspot.in/2017/07/without-kiss.html

Remembering the past you.(open letter).

Please, don’t consider my feelings…when you  read it. They always change.

psd copyI have so many times mentioned you in my post directly and indirectly. I don’t know sometimes it is intentionally, and sometimes it is not. But you are always there…..

Last time; when, we met. you asked me something. You asked me “why you?” and I said “it was our age of stupidity.”

I always ask this question to myself, that why I have fallen for you…and guess what? there are things, which makes you different; but still the question remain still “unanswered.”

You already know that I am very much infatuated with you.
So, here are somethings which I want to check once again.

  • I found you very amusing from very beginning. I don’t know why I easily gets distracted by you.
  •  From the time, I confessed my feelings for you till now….there are many minor details..I still remembered about you.
  •  I still remember idiots things…..you have done and many things which are told about you.
  •  Remembering good thing about you makes me happy.
  • I still have your letters inside my wardrobe and I consider them very  precious…. (feeling like they are love letters….)
  •  I remember once; I wrote lyrics of a song I dedicated to you….and one of the song is from movie ‘jannat’ –“ha tu hai.”
  •   I don’t know why ? the time when I was holding grudge for you….I wanted to see you….even though I know that you were ignoring me.
  •  I took you as a challenge of my life and you know what  I am still battling.
  •  I made choice to move on…..but sometimes; I feel I am hooked to your memories…..
  •  It was you, who was my page turner. And you will be always ; my bookmark.
  • I don’t know about future ….but I know how to accept things. So, I know anything can change.

So, I know  you may be confused when you read it …. I still make things, not so easy.

Please, don’t consider my feelings…when you  read it. They always change.

  1. PS. It’s  dedicated ….and I can’t portrait you. Wishes! for your future.please don’t mind after reading it..

After one year of job 

Hi! Everyone, I know I am not a good blogger and whatever I post is mostly related to my life and problems I am facing. Many of you might not understand what problems I am talking about and to understand that You have to read both of my blogs deeply… anyways. I don’t want you all to do so..

Today I am going to post something about how I feel in my office…..you  know I have completed my one year of training so I think I should describe  about it…

please click below 

https://anelife16.blogspot.in/2017/06/after-one-year-of-job.html

The truth of my life 

If you found me silent …just know that I have storm inside.

Last year I got job.  I knew my family  (parents);  were more happy than me.

I left all my hobbies for them. Infact I have to live separately from them.

In few days ,I got use to it. But they don’t know that how unhappy I am. 

I can’t sleep properly ,neither I eat properly.  It  already affected my health. 

But mostly ;It effected my mental health.  They don’t know how depressed I am; when I found myself all alone.  

Sometimes, My days are not good…work pressure and living among strangers makes me cry.  I wish someone just know ,how it’s killing me.  I am sacrificing myself for happiness of my family.  

P.s. If you found me silent …just know that I have storm inside.