One side love ,expectations and the jealousy

inside I was more and more jealous with his girlfriend…..


love jealeousyHe was my Crush. We lived in same neighborhood ……I was crazy about him. Not that he was very handsome or a hot guy but he was he… I don’t know what made me fall for him. After so many complex drama, I got chance to be his friend…..but there was more I wanted to become.(please read my earlier post for more understanding. )
We can’t get what we actually we want, sometimes things gets different. I became his friend but he was already someone’s boyfriend. He told me that he is already taken and I was very disturbed by it. Yet, I was in hope that he  would care someday.

We talk like buddies and share our life stories…..but inside I was more and more jealous with his girlfriend…..
Even though I have never seen them together, I could imagine them together everywhere (even in my dream also). I thought why he doesn’t even care about my feelings…..the love I had for him.
One day he told me about his girlfriend everlasting sickness and I thought maybe it’s was my chance to be with him. But he also told me he will be with his girlfriend till the end. I was more shattered by his decision.
Later he asked me out (it was not a date) just to have some private discussion with me… I still remember the day… I was more nervous and bit suspicious about it… It’s one of the awesome days I ever had in my life. He was wearing loose half unbutton shirt … and things were going like a dream until he said those cruel words that “I can’t be with you anymore….. I can’t leave my girlfriend and I know what your expectation are….( well that day I was just expecting a kiss or something romantic ). And everything just ended like nothing happened ever …..The day I was totally destroyed. I could have cried loud and screamed at the top…but I remained like a dead soul. Only my eyes shed tears secretly .
The only wise person I had to talk (my sister) said to me that “boys are confused. They never understand what they wanted. Never believe their words. One day you will get a man who will actually love you the way you want.

PS:-Sometimes LOVE  take you to another world ….

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